


butterfly's repose

by safetyzones



Category: Pentagon (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Cheating, Drinking Games, How Do I Tag, M/M, Never Have I Ever, Non-Explicit Sex, OR IS IT, Songfic, Unhappy Ending, kino centric, like it happens but i didn't write it out because im lazy, two years in hell and still i have yet to figure out how to tag a fic jesus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:07:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23583598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/safetyzones/pseuds/safetyzones
Summary: Hongseok’s heart belongs to Jinho, his mind belongs to Jinho, but his body belongs to Hyunggu. There’s nothing Hyunggu can do to convince him to leave him, Hongseok will always return to his love.
Relationships: Jo Jinho | Jino/Yang Hongseok, Kang Hyunggu | Kino/Yang Hongseok
Comments: 2
Kudos: 29





	butterfly's repose

**Author's Note:**

> when i first heard this song, i fell in love with it so i decided to write a fic while listening to it! i love jinhongseok but the pure lack of kinongseok fics on here breaks my heart so i had to combine the two soooooo enjoy! 🖤

**_AS THE LIGHT OF THE SUN CASTS OVER THE BEDROOM_ ** **,** Hyunggu keeps his eyes closed. He basks in the warmth of the sun peeking through the blinds, in the warmth of the body next to him. He feels the other man’s warmth, and he knows it will disappear soon. As he peeks out of the corner of his eye, he sees the clock. It reads six in the morning, he woke up earlier than Hongseok today. The boy sleeps peacefully next to him, and Hyunggu wishes he could see him like this all the time.

Hongseok belongs to someone else, and Hyunggu knows this. 

He understands that Hongseok only wakes in his bed to leave him before he can say goodbye. Hyunggu knows this. And yet, he lets him in at unholy hours of the night, everytime without fail. Hongseok has a boy, older than both of them, waiting for him back at home. But here, in Hyunggu’s tiny apartment is where he lies at night. He’s the other man, the one who Hongseok isn’t allowed to boast about. Yet, he’s accepted it and nothing ever changes.

Hongseok stirs awake, and Hyunggu turns to look at his beautiful face. He’s perfect, features mapped out on tanned skin that Hyunggu could spend hours daydreaming about, shaggy blue hair covering his eyes. His eyes flutter open, and Hyunggu shuts his, it’s less painful this way. He feels Hongseok kiss the top of his forehead, separating white bangs to put his lips on the skin. He sits up, and gets out of bed, _Hyunggu’s bed_. It’s less warm, it hurts, but Hyunggu keeps his eyes closed. 

Hongseok’s heart belongs to Jinho, his mind belongs to Jinho, but his body belongs to Hyunggu. There’s nothing Hyunggu can do to convince him to leave him, Hongseok will always return to his love. 

  
  


**_THE GUILT EATS HYUNGGU UP INSIDE,_ **but he says nothing.

The friend group of ten go out to celebrate the ending of exam week, finally free of the torture named as testing. They all meet at Shinwon’s place because it’s the biggest out of all of their homes, piling into his living room with an assortment of drinks and foods. Bright smiles and laughter fill the room, and there’s no place Hyunggu would rather be than right here in this moment. 

“Let’s play never have I ever!” Changgu shouts into the air, knocking into Yanan as he does so. “Except instead of putting a finger down, you take off your clothes!” Shinwon suggests, and they all agree. They sit in a circle, all giggling as they decide who goes first.

“Never have I ever, gone skinny dipping.” Yanan starts the game. Hongseok takes off his hat, and Shinwon takes off his socks. Jinho gives Hongseok a strange look, and the younger laughs at him. 

“Never have I ever, eaten all of the leftover cake in the fridge _knowing_ my roommate would’ve wanted some.” Shinwon says, and Changgu glares at him as he takes off his shirt. “You never said you wanted some! Plus, you were going out to eat when I ate it!” Changgu says as he folds his shirt. Shinwon sticks his tongue out like a child, and the rest of them laugh. 

“I got a good one!” Hwitaek raises his hand, and they give him the floor. “Never have I ever kissed someone who was in a relationship.” he says, and they all look at each other with wide eyes, and then Hyunggu takes his beanie off.

He looks over at Hongseok’s face. He’s always been able to hide how he truly feels, he’s so good at never letting anyone know. His face is stoic no matter what, you can never really tell what he’s thinking. Hyunggu’s the opposite, his face and reactions tell all of his secrets. This time though, Hongseok’s eyes give him away. Only for a second, and Hyunggu knows he’s the only one who caught it, Hongseok’s eyes are filled with panic as they make eye contact. 

Everyone is talking at the same time, asking him who it was that he was with. “I don’t kiss and tell.” is all Hyunggu says with a smile, and everyone is in an uproar. “Where was I when this happened? Why didn’t you tell us?” Wooseok asks, and Hyunggu just shrugs. He looks at Hongseok again, but Hongseok is looking at Jinho. The questions go in one ear and out the other as he watches Jinho grasp Hongseok’s hand into his own as he takes a sip of his drink, watching the madness in front of him ensue. 

**_THE MOON IS HYUNGGU’S SOLACE,_ **he thinks as he stares through the window. It’s late, almost reaching the hours of midnight but he can’t find it in himself to sleep. The thoughts in his head cloud his mind, they plague him endlessly, all being filled of a boy with tanned skin and a pretty smile. He wants to take his mind off of it, take his heart off of a boy who will never love him. He wants to relieve the pain, but nothing works. Hookups, smoking, drinking, nothing works. He tried cigarettes, but it did nothing but give him terrible breath, and he’s too worried about his health to ever do it again. Drinking doesn’t matter, liquor fails to give him the effect it used to. Being under another body should make him feel alive, but it doesn’t. All he can ever think about is Hongseok, Hongseok, Hongseok. 

There’s someone at the door, three knocks echo through the apartment. Who could that be at this hour? Who would want to see him? Hyunggu forces himself to get up, but whoever it is has already entered. Hyunggu has only given a key to three people.

“Hongseok-ah” he says out into the open air before turning around, being met with a familiar face. He smiles at Hyunggu, shutting the door and walking towards him. “I missed you, a lot.” he says as he envelops the younger one in a hug. Hyunggu knows where this will go, but yet he can’t bring himself to try to change. As he’s trapped in Hongseok’s arms, it feels so _right_. It feels as if he was always meant to be here. 

Hongseok kisses him, and it’s soft for once. Hyunggu wonders what’s gotten into him, why he’s acting this way. Usually when Hongseok kisses Hyunggu, it’s fast, rough, quick. They understand they have a limited time together, they know not to leave harsh marks that won’t fade fast enough. But here, in this moment, Hongseok cups Hyunggu’s face gently, kisses him like he means it. Hyunggu grabs his waist, and he feels so at peace. For once, he feels as if he’s the only one.

Hongseok breaks the kiss, and drags him to the bedroom. Their bodies meet once again, but it’s different this time. There’s a connection, a string is tied between them. It’s something like making love, but Hyunggu knows that’s not what happened. Hongseok makes love to _Jinho_ , not Hyunggu.

**_HONGSEOK SHOWS UP UNPROMPTED WITHOUT A SMILE,_ ** and Hyunggu lets him inside.

“It’s the middle of the day, is something wrong?” Hyunggu asks. Hongseok refuses to meet his eyes, and both of them sit on Hyunggu’s couch. “Hyunggu, there’s no other way I can say this,” Hongseok starts, and Hyunggu doesn’t want to listen, he knows what’s coming and yet he doesn’t want to accept. 

“We can’t keep doing this, I can’t be with you anymore.” Hongseok says, and Hyunggu feels the tears welling up in his eyes. “Hongseok, you can’t be serious. What are you even on about?” He knows he shouldn’t be fighting this, he knows he should just let him go but he can’t. Not like this, Hongseok can’t go like this.

“I love Jinho, I’m sorry but I can’t keep treating him like this. This was a mistake, Hyunggu. You know that.” Hongseok looks him in the eyes as his words pierce the younger’s heart. “Well then why did you come back? You kept coming back for months! You came here almost every night for seven months.” Hyunggu can feel the tears falling but he can’t stop it. “I’m sorry, but I don’t love you. What we had wasn’t love, and you know that. We both knew that.” Hyunggu knows Hongseok is right, but he doesn’t want to hear it. 

“Get out. Just leave, and don’t come back.” Hyunggu says, and Hongseok leaves him. 

Hyunggu knew they would come to an end, he knew Hongseok loved Jinho, and he always will. Hyunggu cries for the love lost between them, cries for being left behind. Hongseok’s body might belong to Hyunggu, but his heart never will. 

**Author's Note:**

> thank u for making it to the end! i love u, please remember to drink water, wash your hands, wear a mask, and stay safe 🖤
> 
> twt - ptgwsn


End file.
